When I was conversing with a new friend recently, she said, “I didn’t choose my career. It chose me.” How many of us can say this? If not, why? Is it because we haven’t learned to trust our own creativity, boldness, and intuition yet? It’s a fact that adolescents deal with peer pressure at alarming levels these days. We can get so focused on showing them how to respond in the moment and respect their values in spite of what others say that we sometimes fail to address the underlying beliefs they may have adopted in the process.
I was bullied in elementary school because I loved to read. I took my book with me to the bathroom breaks in fourth grade and the kids made fun of me because I’d rather read than talk to them. It got worse the older I became. I was accused of acting white because I enjoyed school, I attended the advanced classes, and I still liked to read. It hurt my feelings, but I continued to defy the bullies. Problem is, in the process, I’d adopted a limiting belief that controlled the goals I even allowed myself to set. You see, since I was bullied for being a black girl who liked to read, I began to internalize the message that black girls don’t read, but more importantly, they don’t write-at least not books. I didn’t know any authors so whenever anyone asked me what job or career I’d like to have, author never came to mind. It wasn’t until later when someone at my church said that it was time to “write those books,” that I began to consider it as a possibility.
What kinds of things have your daughters, your students, your mentees, your neices begun to believe about themselves? Do they believe that their dream is within reach, that they will be able to enjoy healthy relationships, and that they are courages and strong beyond measure? Have you asked them what goals they’ve set and why? Do their goals connect with their creativity and personality at all? Challenge them to use their resources like Youtube and Instagram to follow influencers that are working in fields which they’re passionate about so that they visualize what it looks like to live out the lives they’ve been too afraid to envision. Challenge them to practice it daily, and remind them that God gives us the desires of our hearts and He’s placed those things within them for a reason (Psalm 37:4)
While you’re at it, why don’t you share what limiting beliefs you’ve been led to internalize for too long? I’d love to keep this conversation going and hear what you’ve chosen to overcome. Talk back to me, and consider registering for my goal setting conference here in Las Vegas on Saturday, June 30 today!