This summer, I launched an internship program-while I was supposed to be taking a break. Y’all pray for ya girl. I have to admit that it could have been the best thing that I did this summer. It stretched me. It helped me develop a new capacity for leadership. It opened my eyes and it has led me to research an entirely new skill set I never knew existed. What I found most interesting and surprising was how much it reminded me that we were created to love.
There were so many reasons to ignore the unction, the calling, the sensation deep within my heart to establish a summer internship program. Let me name a few…
- I knew nothing of how to lead a successful internship and I could end up looking stupid.
- I had no clue if anyone would even be interested and I could end up looking stupid.
- I didn’t know if I could have a first draft of the book printed and prepare quality photos and videos or if I would end up looking stupid.
- I wasn’t sure the girls would actually like the book and show up to the meeting or if I would end up looking stupid.
- I wasn’t sure anyone would respond kindly to any part of the process, therefore leaving me (you guessed it) looking stupid.
Just when I rationalized an answer to the five questions, I repeated the cycle all over again.
Don’t leave me out here. I know I am not the only one who has second guessed something God placed on your heart to do. I know I am not the only one who has ever worried about her reputation, her ego, or her excellent ability to look stupid. I know I’m not the only one who has wondered if the risk is worth it, and I am here to remind you that you were created to love.
Since Unconditional STL is approaching this week, Matthew 22:36-39 is on my mind. Jesus told us that the greatest commandment is to love your God with all your heart, mind, and soul and then to love your neighbor as yourself. When you step out on faith and risk the embarrassment to follow a new opportunity from God, you act on all three. You show that you love God more than you love your pride and your own ability to reason whether it will work out or not. You show that you love yourself by demonstrating the faith to develop a new skillset, and you show that you love others by showing up for those who were waiting for your boldness.
I was scared to launch the internship program, and I could have let it hold me captive, just like you can allow that fear to do the same to you. But we know otherwise. I firmly believe you are still ridin’ with me because you have found the same to be true: God knows best. He knows what we will enjoy, what will light us on fire, and what will make us feel alive all over again. We were created to love our Savior. We were created to love others, and we were created to love ourselves, but we were also created to love our calling, our purpose, and our mission in life. Can I issue a challenge. Get back to your First Love. He will never steer you wrong. He will never leave you exposed. You are loved.